Proof of heaven- eben Alexander

True love casts out all fear. I was reminded again of this verse reading the new afterword in the book. Wanted to write this down before I forgot. I really like this verse and it was one of the verses that spoke to me when I became reacquainted with Christianity. 

More about the book after I've finished it.

A cat, a hat, and a piece of string-Joanne Harris

Love most of Joanne Harris' books. There's always something mischievous and mystical going on in her stories. This book is a collection of short stories and every story begins with how she obtains the inspiration for the plot. The stories are creative and entertaining. I especially love the stories about Hope and Faith, two elderly ladies at a home for the aged.  There were two stories which featured Hope and Faith- one was about how they were barred from an excursion by a staff who was a bully, but through Chris' (a kinder staff) cleverness, was able to transport themselves to a beach with the use of candles, sand, etc. It made me kinda sad at the part when faith and hope would go through travel brochures but knew they would never be able to go to the places they saw in the brochures. 

The other story was about how they outwitted the bully by setting off a false fire alarm and locking the bully up.

It does frighten me a little to think of the future. Would I end up like Faith and Hope in a home for the aged? The idea of home for the aged is pretty much akin to an orphanage. One is abandoned and has to live amongst non-blood relations and adopt them as family. 

Stories are like Russian dolls; open them up, and in each one you’ll find another story.

Fitzgerald

https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2432116-the-beautiful-and-damned

Fitzgerald always wrote such beautiful prose...

The light

There is a light that shines above,

A light that we sometimes fail to see.

Some call it the guardian angel,

Well, some just fail to believe.

In a world where darkness threatens to engulf us,

We need a little light,

To remind us that we will be safe 

That the darkness will never win.

Sometimes when fear is planted in our hearts,

We foolishly wander away from that light.

But the light, it stays and continues to burn,

Like the North Star,

It will lead us home. 

Into the light

The judges sit in their ivory towers

With a wave of their hands

We are put to death.

Don't you dare judge

What you know not of.

The torments that have wretched our desperate souls.

Can you ever be sure

The difference between good and evil?

Can you ever be sure that your eyes are not blinded by the darkness that surrounds you?

Are we ever wise?

Or are we just fools

Pretending otherwise.

In this world, the once great divide

Between black and white

Is no longer clear.

Sometimes we fall,

Deeper and deeper we fall

Into that bottomless pit,

And sometimes the fire below consumes us.

We are just here for a while

We are just waiting for a glimpse of heaven

For that light, for that light,

We await in ernestness. 

For that light to save us from our eternal damnation.

For that light, into that light 

I seek your face

Verse 

C                       Am

Lord I seek your face

C                        Am

Lord I seek your grace

F                         G

In the darkest of place 

                         C         Am

You shine your light on me. 

C                           Am

Lord I'm on my knees

C                           Am

Lord I seek your peace 

You lift my sorrows and my grief

It is in you that I believe.

Chorus

Lord, I just want to praise your name forever more.

You have seen me through my darkest hour,

I have been tossed about in the storm,

But you were always there,

You held my hand and healed all my wounds. 

Lord, I just want to praise your name forever more. 

Ephemeral things

He has gained the whole world,

The world lies small and battered

In the palm of his hands.

And yet, his sorrows are abysmal,

The shadows that hang over his eyes,

Have blinded him. 

He has forgotten what beauty is,

He has not seen the look of love,

In a lover's eyes. 

All the things acquired and gained

Are but ephemeral.

With a gentle touch of the creator's hand,

All will crumble and turn into ashes.

And maybe then,

He will remember what was once important,

Maybe then he will examine his own heart,

Maybe then,

It wouldn't be too late. 

Summer dream

The summer ended too soon,

And I picked up the remnants of our dreams.

We chased the rainbows,

Counted the stars,

Rode the waves of the deep blue ocean,

Felt the mud squishing between our toes,

After the gentle summer rain.

That summer, I believed in you,

That summer I believed in love. 

But the days grew shorter,

The rays of the sun grew ever fainter,

And the sounds of our laughters started to fade.

The rhythm of your heart

No longer beats with mine.

Summer days are gone,

You say.

And it is time to collect our childish dreams,

And toss them to the wind.

I foolishly believed in forever,

But all you had ever wanted,

Was a summer dream.

Songs of love

I admire people who can write poetries of love or songs that speak of love so beautifully that it makes you wanna cry. I don't think I can ever do that. Maybe love is something that is too complex to be understood completely or maybe it's never meant to be understood but felt. How does one write of things that one do not understand ? I guess on earth we may never be able to find complete love, it is oftentimes marred by selfishness, terms and conditions, fears, sorrows, disappointments, etc. 

I don't know why recently I've this desire to write a song but have no idea where to begin, or where to draw the inspirations from. 

Thunderstorms

You know I love the thunderstorms,

When the dark clouds hang low,

The skies are grey,

And the raindrops glisten as they fall

And land on my face.

Pitter patter splatter,

The water swells around my feet,

And I listen, and I listen,

To the sounds of the rain,

And my heart beats

To its constant rhythm.

The unbearable lightness of being-Milan Kundera

I was really taken with the writing style of Kundera. The clever and original way he constructed his sentences. The story was quite captivating at the beginning but I didn't get like the last few chapters. It just felt a bit hasty and disjointed. It was nonetheless a good read despite the feeling that the story didn't go anywhere. The main characters were Tomas and Tereza and was set in Prague. Tomas was a surgeon who fell strangely and quickly in love with Tereza. Tomas was however a philanderer and Tereza, remained with him despite knowing his transgressions. And then there were Sabina and Franz. Franz was married to a prideful Marie-Claude and Sabina was his artist lover, and who was also the lover of Tomas. Franz has strange admirations for people from countries with a history of revolution. He thought persecution, prison, banned books, etc were exciting and perhaps, romantic. But Sabina, having lived through all these, had distaste for them. 

I agree with the sentiments of Franz. Sometimes I too admire and wonder what kind of person I would be, if I had been borne in a country with say, a history of wars, Revolution, or communism. Would I still be the same person that i am? Or would I be me no more ? 

To sum it up, definitely a book worth reading for its unconventionality. 

One too many mornings

Simple but beautiful song.fun playing it as well.   Ralph mctell's version is actually better than Dylan's but too bad it couldn't be found on YouTube and only on spotify. The next best thing I could find was a cover : http://youtu.be/Ql7jTDhm9XY

Antoine de saint exupery the life of death of the little prince- Paul Webster

Finished the book some time ago but never got around to writing about it. The biography is quite well-written in the sense that it not only talked about Antoine but also about the wars in france and antoine's political views. I am just amazed by the passion he had for flying and how he realized his destiny at a young age. It also amused me how despite the difficult and volatile relationship he had with his wife, Consuelo, they stayed together. The relationship drove him into depression and yet, the love he had for her remained. How strange and toxic love could be. Anyway he kinda struck me as a all or nothing man, from the way he would re-write his books over and over again, trying to perfect them, to wanting only to fly (although he eventually started writing) his entire life (he eventually died while flying). But I would think he was a difficult man to be with although he was the clown amongst his co-workers. He would call his friends up in the middle of the night just for them to give input for his novels, or just to discuss an idea. I think he just got so caught up and excited by his own ideas that nothing, not even courtesy and etiquette, could stop him in his tracks. I have admiration for such people though to have such burning passion and zest for the things they love. 

Head over heels

I wonder why you never knew,

That it is in you I found myself.

The heart it chases after you

Over and over again I fell

Head over heels. 

I guess you would never know

Because your eyes were never casted upon me.

And yet love, it strangely grows

Over and over again, the heart's pleas,

They fell on deaf ears.

How hard I've ran after you,

But you just kept on moving

I could never catch up

You belong to the day

And me the night. 

Boldness

The most salient message I got out of the church camp was boldness. I was afraid of being prayed for, afraid of praying for someone because I was afraid of getting too emotional, afraid that I would cry in front of others.

And then it sorta hit me why I have always said that I'd never met with any adversities in life and that my life did not have any ups and downs. It is only because I've always chosen the easiest route even if I knew it was not the best one. Sometimes I was afraid of making difficult decisions because I did not want to be pushed out of my comfort zone and I would just drift with whatever came my way, aimlessly. 

Because I can never let anyone in,

So loneliness is for me to keep.

I am tired of breathing the same air,

Tired of watching the same sunsets,

Tired of waiting,

For a change to happen.

You know, I once had beliefs 

But now they are all broken,

You know, I used to have dreams,

But the night has ended 

And the day,

It brings reality and awakening.

The sorrows they never end

The grief, it accompanies every beat of my heart.

I yearn for a new morning 

When the heart no longer mourns.

And I can hear again,

The singing of a new dawn. 

I never knew how far you would travel with me.

You know the places I want to go

These seafaring legs 

You know, they will never stop running. 

Lyrics

View from the edge

And the elevator opens 

An old man with a cane

Steps in kinda slowly

And winces with the pain 

Or maybe with the memory 

Of that dress you wear

In a fashion so familiar 

Trying not to stare. 

Coz you look like his first love

When he could run for miles

She wore a dress just like yours

And now it's back in style.

And he can see the beauty

That you cannot perceive.

Until you earn the eyes to glimpse it

Just before you leave. 

...a tiny little planet 

A backyard with a hedge

You are safe there in the middle 

Ahh, but the view is from the edge.

Show the way

You say you see no hope, you say you see no reason
We should dream that the world would ever change
You're saying love is foolish to believe
'Cause there'll always be some crazy with an Army or a knife
To wake you from your day dream, put the fear back in your life.

...we play against the fear

We play against the reasons not to try
We're playing for the tears
Burning in the happy angel's eyes

Thought this portions of the lyrics to "view from the edge" and "show the way" were really beautiful.

http://youtu.be/wcRLOCQaM0o

http://youtu.be/_BzviqE2i4A