Fear

I suppose I’m by nature a worrier, weighing every single step never daring to take a risk. Perhaps this may be a source of discontentment coz you know deep down, you are not pursuing all that you want and it makes you feel trapped. 

Fear I guess is a way we protect ourselves, the way human beings have used it to increase their odds of survival. We have used it so well that now we fear even when there’s no imminent threat, we fear the unknown, the future, things that are not even in existence now. 

Is being too comfortable uncomfortable ? For me perhaps I feel that way at times and I wonder how people can go on living perfect lives being comfortable. I wish I could be like that - no pursuit, with nary a care.  

Burnout

 We are trapped in our cocoon, not knowing how others are, or how we really are. Although I can’t say I absolutely abhor CB or its milder version, I feel a sense of disconnect from people. Also finding myself getting a little short these days & being more calculative of my time and effort. Sometimes I just feel so inundated by everyone’s request and I wonder if I’ve inevitably become everyone’s PA and someone everyone takes for granted.  I’m not sure if there can come a day when I can let others do the heavy lifting for me. But knowing myself, it’s probably hard for me to ask for favor or help. Feeling really sick and tired. 

Hermit crabs

The home has become the workplace, the bar, the restaurant, the gym, the bbq, the library, the theatre, the church, these days. Wonder if we will all become hermits in time to come.